Shyness and Shame in Online Dating

Abstract

The Internet has become an increasing popular way to form new relationships. Previous research has examined the demographics of individuals who use online dating sites and personality characteristics of these individuals, but few studies have examined how these individuals view using online dating sites to find partners. The presence of a stigma towards online dating has been demonstrated in previous research, although there has been little investigation into the factors that contribute to this stigma. This study examined the potential forces behind that stigma, specifically shyness and shame. Of particular interest was how shyness, shame, and stigma towards online dating contribute to an unwillingness to disclose that a relationship began online. It was hypothesized that shyness would be related to shame and that shame would be related to stigma. It was expected that individuals experiencing higher levels of stigma would be more likely to lie about the origin of a relationship and that individuals who had created online dating profiles would also be more likely to lie about the origin of a relationship. Finally, it was hypothesized that individuals who experienced higher levels of shyness and shame, had been involved in relationships that began online, and perceived higher levels of stigma would be more likely to lie about the origin of a relationship. Self-report surveys measuring these constructs were administered through an online survey website, therefore sampling from an Internet using population. Results revealed partial support for these hypotheses. In general, it appears that lying about the origin of a relationship is not an appropriate objective measure of how individuals are affected by stigma towards online dating and the implications of this are discussed. Support was increased for stigma towards online dating in that individuals who had created an online dating profile endorsed more stigma than those who had not. However, further analysis indicated that involvement in a relationship that began online directly contributed to a decrease in stigma towards online dating while higher levels of shame contributed to an increase in stigma. Limitations and suggestions for future research are discussed.